Here's a Funny for Friday which I recalled some time today, maybe yesterday. Wish I could write with the slurred accent.
It's about a wine-o who goes to the doc because he's got a bad toe, probably stubbed it. After the doc sets that right, he says to the bloke, "Y'know Mickey, you have to give away the plonk. It's no good for you. Let me show you something."
"Right-o Doc." says Mickey. "Wotcha got?"
"Well," says the Doc, "Here's a glass of water. If I put a worm in there...see he just swims around."
"Aw, he'sho cute, Doc."
"But look here," replies the Doctor, "Here's a glass of whisky. When I put the worm in this glass, he just shrivels up and dies. Not a pretty sight."
"Nah, Doc, downright narsty! An' it juss goes to show, that if you drink a lotta shcotch, ya won't get worms!"